Zoe the Dalmatian is fifteen, and like all old creatures, she does not enjoy change. In her life, each day should be a healthy mixture of sleep, food, walkies, and attention, with a possible side of peanut butter. While the occasional trip to the store is welcome, long car journeys are not. At all. Ever.… Continue reading Traveling With a Histrionic Dalmatian
Vacations are largely wasted on me. I hate strange beds, become annoyed by eating out too often, get tired too quickly, and really would just rather be writing. My idea of a lovely holiday is one in which I just move somewhere for a month or two, so I can have all the fun of a… Continue reading Scotland In Slightly Dumb Photographs
I know I’ve talked about tenses before. I’ve said lots about how much I love present tense, and why you should give it a chance. But today, I’m taking a different track. I’m talking about how past tense might actually be trying to kill me. This seems excessive, I know. “Past tense is a construct… Continue reading Me, Dying in Past Tense
I’m beginning to learn what the phrase “those who can’t do, teach” means. It doesn’t mean only people who are crap at something teach it. It means that if you do something instinctively, actually trying to figure out what you do enough to explain it to someone else is a process that might actually drive… Continue reading Those Who Can’t Do, Teach the Rest of Us Coping Skills
The other day, someone on a forum I frequent was complaining about how difficult Twitter is. Every time they go on there, someone is arguing about politics! Or race! Or religion! It made them feel like they couldn’t even venture a comment without someone jumping down their throat. Twitter is awful! Er, no, you’re just… Continue reading Twitter for Beginners, Or: If Your Twitter Feed Sucks, It’s Your Fault
Well, first of all, don’t click on articles like this. That is, of course, impossible. Clickbait is everywhere—on blogs, on respected news sites, on your friends’ Facebook feeds. Once the territory of newspaper headlines, it’s now the stuff of everyday life, and thousands of people spend their lives dreaming of that perfect clickbait headline. “She… Continue reading How to Avoid Clickbait
A few weeks ago, Husband decided to grow some herbs. He went about this in his usual fashion, where he said, “I’m going to grow herbs in our apartment!” and I said “No” and he did it anyway. Before I knew it, five little pots arrived in the mail, pastel-colored in concession to my decorating… Continue reading My Husband Is the Plant Whisperer
One of the downsides of doing lots of formatting and design work is you begin to recognize common fonts. “But why is that a downside? Isn’t that cool to be able to look at a brochure and go ‘Calibre, Calibre, Times New Roman?’” No. Because most people use the same fonts over and over and… Continue reading Papyrus: Looking Terrible Since 332 BC
Recycling: what is it? Is it the thing where instead of throwing out that old T-shirt, you clean a floor with it? Is it putting aluminum cans in a bin? Or is it a vicious battle of individual versus bureaucracy that won’t end until one side perishes? Every country has its own recycling mandates, and… Continue reading Recycling and Me: A Melodrama
Most of writing is pretty subjective. What styles we use, adjectives we choose, the rhythms and phrasing—they all depend on the author’s voice. That said, there are a few things we can all agree are pretty awful no matter who writes them. Not with characterization or plotting or world-building, but with the building blocks we all use:… Continue reading The Ten Commandments of Writing
Under-Paid, Over-Enthused 